i will get over you.

im surprised that my friends know me better than i do.
they know my habits, my thinkings.
i guess they will be the ones who are there for me.


had a really good cry.
aloy just made me realised i've been deceiving myself all these time that i hate you and have long forgotten you.
how can i forget you in such a short time?
how could i get over you so quickly in just 2 months?
for justin, it took me 1 whole week to cry and 1 year plus to forget him and move on.
and for you who have made a huge impact in my life,
it will just take longer.
god knows how long.
i always thought to forget you in the shortest time,
i must hate you.
but i was wrong. it made it even harder to forget you.
I will take things one step at a time now.
no point rushing because it will just leave traces of memories.
it has been a hard week for me.
to have dreams of you for the entire week. even during the operation when i was terrified,
you were there in my dreams, holding my hand and telling me everything's gonna be alright.
i knew something will happen but i didnt expect this.


i cant blame anyone for not able to accompany me.
for the whole of past 3 weeks, i really dont want to bother any of you.
It's my problem, i should learn by myself to overcome this.
i know you guys will tell me to give you a call whenever i want.
but it's just not the same.
and when we're able to meet up awhile,
it just doesnt seem right to bring down the happy mood.

i've the habit of keeping things to myself.
and i thought telling the beach was the most effective way.
i guess not anymore.

truth hurts but i need to accept the reality.
i thought i have let go of you.
and since i have not, i will try my very best to let you go in my heart since you have started afresh.
it's kinda hard since we were once together.
but no matter what, i will try my very best this time.

thankyou, my friend.
you've been very very kind to me.
3 years ago, we didnt really started off really good.
but im glad, you were persistent to be there for me whenever i was feeling low.
i cant thank you enough.
and cheers to our friendship.


i will give this time one good shot to move on.